Sunday, November 21, 2010
Limitless Pancakes.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
How to Pick a Fight With the Wrong Group of People
At last, we were up at the cabin, home of awesome memories and promise of new ones. Once it got dark, a group of the older kids decided to gather out in a clearing to go stargazing. We all lay down on the ground right next to Man Cub's car and just relaxed and stared at the stars. I was in between Water Fetcher and Hiss. After we had been relaxing for a while, Water Fetcher said, "Oh my gosh! I'm so stressed! With black belt testing, and school... and I'm only going to get more stressed after fall semester starts..."
I cut her short with, "Hey! We're stargazing!"
"I like Bandit's style." Tiger said laughing.
A few more minutes went by, then Water Fetcher again broke the silence by saying, "You know what form I hate?"
"Who cares? We're stargazing." I said.
"Yeah, ma'am, we're stargazing!" Hiss reminded her.
A few more minutes, then I heard Water Fetcher whisper "Oh my gosh..."
"Ma'am..." I said "Are you stressing out again?"
She sat up a little, "How could you tell?"
"Because I can read minds!"
She stared at me skeptically.
"Oh my gosh..." I mimicked.
"Oh... right." Water Fetcher said laying back down. "Sorry."
"Water Fetcher, relax, this isn't the place to stress. We're here to retreat." Man Cub said, sprawled out on the ground
"Yes sir..." Water Fetcher whined.
After a few minutes of different conversation, we heard a twig snap behind us. We all went silent and turned around. More suspenseful silence, then out jumped Treasure and Zombie, yelling and shining flashlights in our eyes.
"Ah! TREASURE" Man Cub yelled covering his eyes, as Treasure tried to blind him. Tiger put him in a headlock as I stole his flashlight and gave him a taste of his own medicine. He screamed and closed his eyes. Then I went to seek revenge on Zombie, who was already being taken down by Tio and Man Cub.
After that whole ordeal was over, we were all full of energy. Fluffy started climbing on Man Cub's car, then Man Cub shoved him off and started climbing up himself. He got to the top, and went into his victory pose, as everyone clapped.
"Wait!" He said, jumping down and getting into his car. He turned on the CD player cranked it up. The song "The Fish" came on. It goes, 'Everybody's doing the fish, yeah, yeah, yeah..." So of course, we all started doing our own rendition of 'the fish' as Man Cub danced on top of his car. Even Treasure was doing the Fish!
After the song was over we all started laughing and messing around loudly.
"Sorry, guys. I had to get that out of my system!" Man Cub said.
"Its okay, sir, I think we all did." I said.
It was then that three men approached from the cabin across the way.
"Hey guys, could you quiet down? We have babies that are trying to sleep." One of them said.
"Oh sorry!"
"Sorry, we'll quiet down."
"We didn't know... sorry!"
No denying it, we were being very loud and we did feel bad.
"Thanks guys." He said, then they started walking away.
"There are a lot of people here! It's the freaking wilderness!" Tio whispered. We all laughed.
The three guys must've thought we were making fun of the because they started coming back. "What did you say??" One of them asked very accusingly.
"Nothing..." Tio faltered, "Have a good night sir."
"What are you guys even doing out here? Do you have a cabin or something?" Another asked angrily.
"Yeah, we have a cabin back there." Man Cub responded.
"Well, can't you guys go party over there or something."
"Yeah, we're headed back there.... goodnight sir." Tio said.
"Come on what did you say?" said the one who couldn't let go. "If I ask nicely will you tell me?"
"He just said that there were a lot of people out here for the wilderness." Man Cub said.
"That really is all he said." I backed him up.
"We're sorry, we didn't know you had babies." Man Cub said.
A few people laughed, which just set these guys off even more.
It was then that they started cussing at us. Man Cub switched the grip on his flashlight, and I knew for a fact that he had at least two knives on his person. At this point, I decided that these people weren't worth my attention and started walking away. Treasure came with me. We were only a short distance away, when we heard them start making threats.
"Look, if you're going to be a *&%$%#$#, I'm going to have you in that mud in 3 seconds!" This was when Treasure and I both started laughing quietly and adding up their odds. First off, these guys were obviously drunk. 3 drunk guys vs 9 martial artists ranging only from 2nd degree black belt to red belt, training for years how to deal with people like them. 3 of us could all share one of them! Second, they were treating us like a bunch of delinquents. We were probably the most respectful group of teenagers they would find. We referred to each other as Ma'am and Sir, for heaven's sake!
Treasure whispered, "You'll have me in the mud in 3 seconds, I'll have you in intensive care in 1."
"They probably chose the worst group of people to pick a fight with!" I laughed.
"Yeah," Treasure said. "A martial arts camp!"
Soon we were all gathered back at the cabin. "Can you believe those guys?" Zombie whispered coming from the trees and joining the circle we had created.
"I'm gonna have you in the mud in 3 seconds!" Tio said, making us all laugh.
"I did feel bad." Man Cub started, "Before they started swearing at us."
"Well... we were being loud..." Hiss said with some guilt.
"Hiss, we said we were sorry, they're the ones who turned it into a huge ordeal." I reasoned.
She nodded, still looking a little guilty.
"There were 9 of us and 3 of them!" Fluffy pointed out, with almost an excited tone of voice.
"There are so many morons in the world." I said.
"Agreed." Tiger said.
"Why are we whispering?" Zombie asked. "Are we still worried about waking up their babies?"
"No." Whispered Treasure. "We're worried about waking up Kwanjangnim!"
At this everyone started laughing.
"Lets see how many years of martial arts training we have between us." Water Fetcher said.
"Man Cub, how many do you have?"
"11 years."
"Treasure?"
"Eight"
"Zombie?"
"Six"
We went around the whole circle.
"So..." Water Fetcher calculated. "Between all of us we have almost 70 years! We don't stand a chance!"
We all started laughing.
A purple belt started walking into the woods.
"Woah, wait! Where are you going?" Man Cub asked, halting him.
"Just to the car to get some stuff, sir." he said.
"Uh... not alone." Man Cub said, following him into the woods. When they came back Man Cub looked upset.
"Did they come to get you sir?" Fluffy asked.
"No." Man Cub said, "But they were blasting music in their cabin."
This news was followed by a series of outcries such as,
"Are you serious?"
"So much for babies..."
"Morons!"
"Do you still feel bad Hiss?"
Then Tiger chimed in, saying "Well guys, think of it this way. In the morning, they won't remember any of this. Plus, they don't know that they picked a fight with the wrong group of people.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Vampire Scavenger Hunt: My Cemetery Senses are Tingling (Part 3)
"Are we still going to the mall?" I asked as Treasure and I arrived last in the car.
"I don't think we have time." Christy responded. "But if we get to Midway really fast, then we can do some stuff there."
"Like spelling 'vampires rock' in fries." said Jay-spoon.
So, we drove all the way to Midway, through the winding Provo canyon. I let Jay-spoon borrow my necklace for a while, and when he went to give it back ended up throwing it at Treasure's head. Treasure turned around and said, "Where's the pie?"
"Well, we don't have one." I reminded him. "But he can wear the 'I disrespected my captain' sign."
Treasure reached into the manila envelope that contained the shameful sign and handed it to Jay-spoon, who sighed and put it on.
We finally reached Midway and consulted the list of tasks.
"We need to pose in front of a cemetery." Water Fetcher said.
"I'm sure there's a cemetery around here..." Christy said.
"There must be." I reasoned. "Cause people never stop dyin'."
"Thank you, Bandit." Water Fetcher said.
"I can tell there's one nearby." Christy said. "I can feel it. My cemetery senses are tingling..."
"CEMETERY!!!" I yelled pointing at a sign that said 'Midway Cemetery' with an arrow pointing left.
"Woah... Thats just freaky." Treasure said.
"You have cemetery senses!!" Jay-spoon exclaimed.
"I didn't even know!" Christy said, surprised at herself.
We found the cemetery and stood in front of it's steel classic cemetery gate while Water Fetcher took the picture.
"Is there anything else we can do here?" Christy asked.
"Don't we need to find a statue?" Treasure asked in response.
"Yeah, there should be one in a cemetery." Water Fetcher said.
"Okay, you guys walk through and I'll drive to the other side to pick you up." Christy decided, returning to the car.
We all wandered through the graveyard looking for a statue. We found one of an angel praying. "Okay, what do we need to do with the statue?" I asked.
"Someone needs to pose identically next to it, and someone else needs to be acting like a vampire ready to attack." Water Fetcher paraphrased from the list.
I got down on my knees and pretended to pray, while Treasure poised for attack. Water Fetcher took the picture, and we all dove back into the car.
"We need to find a place to get fries." Christy said. "Did you guys see any place like that?"
"There was some grill at a gas station." Treasure said. "They might have fries."
"Lets go check." said Water Fetcher.
We got to the gas station, and I turned around and looked at the license plate on the car behind us!
"VB!!!" I yelled pointing excitedly at the car.
"Really?" Christy said turning around.
"Look! They're even in order!" Treasure said running over to the car.
"Okay Treasure. Pose like a bat." Water Fetcher instructed, pulling out her camera.
Treasure did his best bat impersonation while Water Fetcher documented it.
"Okay, in the gas station we need to get fries, and build a bat cave out of condiments." I said.
"I'll go order fries, and you guys build the bat cave." Water Fetcher said, running into the grill section of the gas station. The rest of went into the regular gas station part.
I found the condiments, Treasure grabbed a paper fry tray and started putting ketchup packets all around it. We built a pretty awesome bat cave, then Water Fetcher came over and took a picture of it.
"Did you order fries?" I asked.
"Yeah, lets go back to the grill place." She said.
We all entered the grill section, but as we went in, we passed the lady working at the counter of the gas station. She had long dark hair.
"Weren't we supposed to get our picture taken with somebody with long dark hair?" Christy whispered to me.
"I thought it was black hair..." I responded. "I can't remember though. We'll have to consult the list after we're done with the fry task."
"So what are you guys doing?" asked one of the ladies at the grill.
"We're doing a vampire scavenger hunt on the way to a cabin." Water Fetcher told them. "We have to spell 'Vampires Rock' with fries."
"That sounds fun!" said the other lady. "Well, we haven't seen anyone else like you guys in here yet. Is it a birthday party or something?"
"No, its our martial arts group." Water Fetcher responded. "We do something like this every year for our Summer camp."
"Thats awesome!" said the first. "Is there anything else we can help you with in your scavenger hunt?"
"I don't think so..." Water Fetcher said, consulting the list. "We're almost out of time, and we only have hard tasks left."
"Like what?" asked the second.
"Like, find a coffin..." Water Fetcher began reading.
"We could go to a mortuary." Treasure suggested. Then looked at Jay-spoon. "Where's your sign?"
He pulled it out of his pocket. "I lost the pin."
"Clip it onto your name label." I suggested.
Jay-spoon signed and clipped it on. "I'm sorry captain! I didn't mean to hit you with Bandit's necklace!"
"Well, somebody had to wear the sign." I said in a reasonable voice.
"Some of those tasks sound hard." one of the clerks said. "How are you getting them done?"
"Well, the ones we have done were a little more easy." Water Fetcher told them. (She had continued reading during the whole exchange with Treasure, Jay-spoon, and I)
We got our fries, then looked at them.
"Woah! These are huge!" Jay-spoon said.
"And hot!" Treasure said recoiling his hand fast after touching one.
"I guess we'll have to break them to spell it." I said.
Christy got a bunch of napkins and laid them on a table, while the two ladies at the front counter watched us with interest.
We began the spelling process, with Christy breaking the fries, Jay-spoon handing them to Treasure, Emma handing them to me, and Water Fetcher watching to make sure it looked good. Treasure was spelling 'Vampires' and I was spelling 'Rock'.
Needless to say, I finished before Treasure, and stared spelling the end of 'vampires'.
"It's not showing up very well..." Water Fetcher pointed out.
"You could put some fry sauce on them." Suggested one of the ladies at the counter. "That would help it to show up on the camera."
"Good idea!" Said Water Fetcher, grabbing a bottle of fry sauce. As soon as Treasure and I finished she began outlining the inside of the fries with the sauce.
"Oh, yeah! Thats much better!" Said the other at the counter.
Water Fetcher took a picture, then we commenced feasting on the fries. They were really good too! Not just salty, but seasoned too.
"That Lady out there had long dark hair." Christy reminded us. "Did the list say long black hair, or long dark hair?"
Water Fetcher consulted the list. "Long dark hair! This could work!"
We crossed into the gas station section of the store to the lady at the front counter. The two working at the grill followed us, showing a great amount of interest in our quest.
Christy explained our situation to her and asked her if she would pose all scary with us for a picture.
"Oh." She said, looking at her fellow employees, "I see how it is. 'There's a scary looking lady over here! Come get your picture taken for your vampire game!'" She was dripping with sarcasm.
"No!" Water Fetcher tried to defend, "We just need someone with long dark hair..."
"Uh-huh..." She said sarcastically, while the other two employees giggled behind us.
"Okay, I'll do it!"
We all gathered around and posed in our scariest fasion, while Water Fetcher took the picture. As we left, we could still hear her mumbling about being 'scary looking'. We got back in the car and Jay-spoon said, "Those people were awesome!"
"Yeah, they were almost more interested than us!" I said. "Wait, Jay-spoon. Where's your sign?" His sign was missing again.
"I don't know! I must've lost it!"
"That soon?" Treasure asked.
There was a red sharpie from signing Hiss's shirt (for her birthday) and I grabbed it. "Here Jay-spoon, I'll put it somewhere you won't lose it." I then proceeded to write the whole shameful phrase on his arm. Now he was stuck with it for at least a few days.
"Well, lets head to our destination. I don't want to be late." Christy said.
"Agreed." Treasure said.
"Aye captain!" I said.
We arrived at the resort first, followed by Dancer's team, which was then followed by Laurie's team. We were all showing off our team's painted nails, and swapping stories, and counting down the seconds before Man Cub's team lost half it's points.f
We all cheered when that time arrived and there was no sign of Man Cub's team. "Yeah!! They lost half their points!" Zombie cheered.
"Not yet, according to my clock." Hiss said, raining temporarily on Zombie's parade. But even when Hiss's clock reached the end, there was no sign of Man Cub's team.
"Does someone want to call him and see if he's close?" Chungsanim asked.
"I will." I volunteered. I dialed Man Cub's number. "Hey Man Cub, where are you? You don't know? What...? You're looking at Tiger? Oh... you're cursing at Tiger. Okay, let me give the phone to someone who can tell you where you are." I handed the phone to Kwanjangnim, who eventually got them safely to the rest of the group, then we headed up to the cabin for more fun and adventure.
For those of you playing along at home, we tied for second place. :)
Vampire Scavenger Hunt: Freaking Perfectionist (Part 2)
We got to Walmart and started out with our same game plan that we had for the last store. Captain instructed us to meet back in isle 1.
I ran to get the food coloring and found Treasure with his bloody steak. While we were waiting I saw a nail salon. "Treasure! The list said that we had to go convince a nail technician to paint one of someone's nail half black and half red!"
"Okay, go talk to them and see if someone will. Give me your food coloring." I handed it over and ran to the nail salon.
I went up to the nail technician and explained my situation to him. He agreed, after he was done doing someone else's nails. I thanked him and said I'd be right back. I ran back to Treasure, "He'll do it!" I told him.
"Well, go get it done right now!"
"I have to wait for Water Fetcher so she can take pictures." I reminded him.
It was then that Water Fetcher showed up. "Water Fetcher! I convinced the nail tech to paint one of my nails! You need to come take pictures!"
"Okay, lets go!" She said putting her garlic in Treasure's outstretched hand.
We both ran back to the salon. The man was still doing someone else's nails, so we had to wait. After waiting for a while, the lady who was having her nails done said, "Isn't the point of a scavenger hunt to get done fast? You can do hers after you're done with this nail." she said, smiling at us.
"Thanks!" We said.
I went over to the polish colors to pick out the black and red polish, as the nail tech had instructed me. I then sat at the chair and held out one of my hands. The nail guy took it and started filing it. He then started very sloooooowly painting the nail half black.
"It doesn't have to look good." I said. "It just has to be half black, half red."
He looked at me, then continued his slow work.
Water Fetcher snapped a few pictures. The nail guy then reached for my other hand. "Oh, it only has to be one nail." I told him.
Again he looked at me, then took the other hand and started slowly filing that too.
Water Fetcher looked at him, looked at me, then said, "I'm going to go find a Twilight related news article." and left.
Treasure and Jay-Spoon showed up before long. "We got all the stuff!" Treasure announced. "I even found a kinda vampire looking card... I hope it counts as a greeting card." It looked like a label type thing, but who cares?
"Okay, Water Fetcher is looking for a news article." I informed them as the nail tech took my first hand back and started slowly on the red. "Go get her to take your picture!"
They both set off to look for her, while I sat impatiently in the salon chair. The three of them returned about five minutes later.
"We found some people to scare!" Jay-Spoon said excitedly. "We were supposed to find 3 people and pose like vampires while they acted scared!"
"Awesome!" I said, thinking I was almost done. The guy got up and walked away, and I put my two nails in front of the fan. He then returned with a shiny polish, took my hand and started slowly coating my nail in it.
I turned to my team with a desperate look on my face and said, "Go find something else to do!"
"Okay, we'll meet you back here!" Treasure said, as the all ran off into the store.
When finally the nail guy was done, he had me stick my hands in front of a fan. I sat there for a while, then decided that I was on too tight of a timetable, got up, and started to walk away.
"Now be careful!" The nail tech warned.
"I will! Thanks!" I said, exiting the salon and seeking out my friends.
I found them and we finished a few more tasks including: Spelling BAT on the ground with ourselves, finding an exact outfit we were told to, finding someone with honey colored eyes, posing artistically with 5 different kinds of forks, finding a vampire doll and posing like we'd won the lottery with it, and a few others.
We then decided to leave the store and head for midway, and get more done once closer to the cabin. We got to the parking lot and Water Fetcher said, "We need to find a license plate with VB on them, for Vampire Bat."
"Okay, everyone find a row of cars, and look as we go back to our car!" Treasure instructed.
We couldn't find any. I ended up with Treasure in the back of the parking lot. "Ugh, where's the car?" He asked. "NAVIGATOR!!!" He shouted, pointing at me.
"Captain, the car is located somewhere in the outer recesses of this parking lot!" I responded.
Treasure laughed, then I saw the car driving toward us. "There captain! Beam me up Scottie!"
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Vampire Scavenger Hunt: Team Bats (Part 1)
We all gathered in the lobby so Kwanjagnim could announce what fun filled adventure we were going to have on our way to the cabin for the epic yearly retreat!